Dr. James Taylor's Response to Lake Almanor and St. Andrew's Academy

I was thrilled, as was the rest of the faculty and the St. Andrew's Family, to have Dr. James Taylor visit us in November and be our speaker for our St. Andrew's Day Conference as well as visit the school and sit in on classes, join discussions, etc.

Below is his response, which he wrote as his weekly column in his local paper in Kansas. Thank you Dr. Taylor for such kind words.



NOTES FROM NORTHEAST KANSAS… and Lake Almanor, California
By James S. Taylor

The name is enchanting – Lake Almanor. It could have been used in a poem by Edgar Allen Poe, but when I arrived at this destination nearly two weeks ago in northern California, I was informed otherwise.

According to local historical sources, in 1914 the vice-president of Great Western Power Company was persuaded to finance a hydroelectric facility that, with the building of a dam to catch the flow of the Feather River, became one of the largest man made lakes in California. It is approximately 52 square miles, rests at an elevation of 4,500 feet, is thirteen miles long and six miles wide, and is 90 feet deep at its deepest point.

There was something of a poetic and romantic history to the lake after all: Guy C. Earl, the vice-president, named the lake after his three daughters, Alice, Martha, and Eleanor – thus, Almanor.

And 1914 was truly an explosive year for the region. The Mt. Lassen National Park sources record that in May of that year the volcano Lassen Peak burst into eruption, beginning a seven-year cycle of sporadic volcanic outbursts. The climax of the episode took place in 1915, when the peak blew an enormous mushroom cloud some seven miles into the stratosphere.
My two room shore side resort apartment at the Dorado Inn offered a wide picture post card view of the Lake, the mountains and Mt. Lassen. The sunsets were such a palette of pastels melting into deep reds spreading over the purple mountains and reflected in the Lake, a tourist, like me, will pull the car off the road to watch, and the locals never tire of commenting on the beauty.

But the lasting impression for me were the trees, Ponderosa pines, Sugar pines, cedar, rising 100 and 150 feet high on both sides of the highways and standing like brave and stalwart sentinels up the sides of the mountains. They are so silent and calm in the morning fog and mist, so deeply green and imperious against a blue sky and high sun. Logging has been the business up here for a long time, but if there have been abuses like clear cuts, I did not see them from the road and suspect over the years laws have been enacted to protect against such destructive greed. These silent giants are obviously thoughtfully thinned to space them just enough not to choke or clutter the growth. As a result, the eye is led over the tawny colored pine needle floor and into the cool darkness of the forest.

The highways, which are in good shape, snake around the sides of mountains through the tall hallways of the pines. Now and then a logging truck grinds up a grade then roars down the other side carrying its stacked load of harvested trees, the circumference of the smallest log bigger than a 50 gallon barrel drum.

I had not come here just to look at the trees and the mountains and the Lake, though that would be a perfectly good thing to do and nothing else. My immediate purpose was to visit a school, a rather special one now in its sixth year. It is small by some standards, maybe by any standards. There are about 30 students, K – 12. There are six teachers. Each morning before school and every day after school, they sing together. They sing hymns according to The Hymnal of the Anglican Church and they say prayers from the 1928 Book of Common Prayer. The boys and girls of St. Andrew’s Academy wear uniforms and are among the happiest and most cheerful group of students I have met. After listening to their singing, seeing how song transforms their faces and their behavior, there is no question in my mind where their composure comes from. Oh, they have their mischief and weaknesses, and they have some of the particular wounds children carry in the modern world; and like other students they need direction, correction, and encouragement.

But I came as an educational consultant or some such inflated title, and as is usually the case, I am the one who learns. And what was that? I saw that the school has sought to be a faculty of friends and the light of this friendship naturally extends to the students who, by the way, stand when teachers or adults enter the room and address them formally, more or less naturally and without stiffness. They have developed a curriculum based on the liberal arts appropriate for grammar and high school. This can be seen in their grammar school writing program based on Aesop Fables and their high school Latin class now translating Caesar; the richness of the literature and philosophy classes; the approach to math and science that along with the rigor does not neglect seeing the beautiful in numbers and order. And they sing, sing and sing. Every student is a member of the school choir under the direction of the headmaster, Fr. Brian Foos.

The morning of my return to Kansas my airplane lifted up to clear the mountains around Reno, Nevada, a little over a hundred miles from Lake Almanor. I looked out the window at the rounded tops of the sparse Sierra Nevada range flattening out as we gained altitude and I thought about how bright the students would have sung in choir that morning, shoulders squared, chins slightly lifted, standing straight and strong as the tall green pines in the forests around Lake Almanor. It seemed that all of creation was singing then. And maybe it was.

Clericus in Houston

A gathering of clergy in Houston this last week was a wonderful time to see old friends, make new ones, and see the new Cathedral of the Diocese of Mid-America.



The Cathedral. The window was commissioned in the late 1800's and gifted to the cathedral from one of the oldest parishes in the diocese. The bottom pane contains a censor with the smoke from the incense ascending upwards through an Alpah and Omega to the diadem above. So our prayers ascend through the Son to the Father.



Old friends, Father John and Father Scott.



New friends, Mike, who will have his orders regularized soon and Father Rusty, priest in Houston.

From the Mouth of Babes

My son is studying to be confirmed by his bishop at the end of the month.  He is a youngest of a group of young confirmands, and I am proud of them all.

Of course, they don't always talk the way we might think they should talk about God.  But conversation with them about God is always enjoyable and often quite rewarding as I learn more about my faith from them.

One of my young confirmands had a hard time grasping the meaning of being gifted with the Holy Ghost at his baptism.  He was probably four or five and he asked:  "Is the Holy Ghost heavy?   Will I still be able to jump if I get the Holy Ghost?"

Of course, those questions are awfully good at reminding me of how very little I know.  My son helped me in that category the other night as we were talking our way through the Apostle's Creed.  

We were talking of Jesus being born of the Virgin Mary (after some discussion of the theotokos, we had to discuss the two natures of Jesus so that he could understand how Mary did not, indeed, exist before God) and of how he grew up into a little boy, like my son, and how he must have played and fallen down and done so many things that boys do.

As we were discussing how very real and human Jesus was in the terms that my son tends to understand, he popped off with:

"Dad, I just really have a problem with that guy."

Of course, my eyebrows raised and I asked which "guy" he was referring to.  

"Jesus, Dad, I just really have a problem with that guy."

"And what problem do you have, son?"

"Well," he began, in his five-year-old voice, "How can he know everything???"

I decided that that was a very good question indeed and saved the rest of the discussion for a later time when, perhaps, my mind might be as sharp, as full of wonder, and as inquisitive as my son's and his fellow confirmands'. 

Aidan's First Day of School

My son has attended school since he was a newborn, but this is the first time that he's actually a student at St. Andrew's Academy! Not a bad start--only had to see the headmaster once....

St. Andrew's Academy Choir Chanting the Te Deum

In place of a thoughtful post, I give you the Te Deum--much more thoughtful than anything I could come up with....

This is a cut off the St. Andrew's CD for Spring, 2006 (cover of the CD above).

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The Doctrine of the Real Presence of Christ in the Holy Eucharist from the Anglican perspective

A friend of mine, Father Derrick Hassert, has written the following on the the doctrine mentioned in the title. Any thoughts, comments, questions, snide remarks?

As Anglicans I believe we must first go to the Scriptures, where we are told by St. Paul that the “. . .Lord Jesus, the same night in which He was betrayed, took bread; and when He had given thanks, He broke it and said, ‘Take, eat; this is My body which is broken for you: this do in remembrance of Me.’ In the same manner also He took the cup when He had supped, saying, ‘This cup is the new testament in My blood: this do ye, as oft as ye drink it, in remembrance of Me.’ For as often as ye eat this bread and drink this cup, ye do show the Lord's death until He come. Therefore whosoever shall eat this bread and drink this cup of the Lord unworthily, shall be guilty of the body and blood of the Lord. But let a man examine himself, and then let him eat of that bread and drink of that cup. For he that eateth and drinketh unworthily, eateth and drinketh damnation to himself, not discerning the Lord's body” (1 Cor 11: 23-29).

Similarly, St. Paul declares to us that “The cup of blessing which we bless: is it not the communion of the blood of Christ? The bread which we break: is it not the communion of the body of Christ? For we, being many, are one bread and one body, for we are all partakers of that one Bread” (1 Cor 10: 16-17). The writings of the Church Fathers, especially the Apostolic Fathers, declare likewise without any great philosophical speculation. The truth of Christ’s words, and the words of St. Paul, are accepted through faith.

When we turn to the formularies of classical Anglicanism (the 1549-1928 Prayer Books, the Articles, and the homilies) what are we told about the Eucharist? We are told that it is an “outward and visible sign of an inward and spiritual grace” the outward part being bread and wine and the inward part being Christ’s Body and Blood. The Articles declare likewise that the “The Body of Christ is given, taken, and eaten, in the Supper, only after an heavenly and spiritual manner.” In the homilies we read of “the due receiving of the blessed Body and Blood of our Saviour Christ under the form of bread and wine.”

Here, in the classical Anglican documents, we have a very Scriptural teaching which conforms as well to the teachings of the Church Fathers. Some wish to press beyond these points of agreement and engage in all manner of scholastic inquiry…. Some will ask the manner of Christ’s Presence in the Sacrament? Is it bodily, physical, carnal, corporal, localized?

Though some may hold to various viewpoints that are more specific than that outlined above by Father Hassert, many would argue that they are not to be pushed on the Church for belief because they cannot be proved by and from Scripture. Many would also argue that the basic Scriptural basis of Anglicanism is also one of its greatest strengths.

St. Andrew's Academy is Hiring!

St. Andrew’s Academy is looking for teachers for the 2006-2007 school year. St. Andrew’s is a K-12, Anglican, classically oriented, college preparatory, parochial school in Lake Almanor, California. We are currently looking for individuals who want to make a difference in students’ lives and the culture at large. Our teachers typically work across a variety of grade levels, but one of our most pressing needs is for grammar school instructors—ones that can provide a stable character influence and set an example of excellence for our youngest students.

Successful applicants do not need teaching experience, but will need to learn and apply instruction. If you have teaching experience, we won’t hold this against you too much. Confidence, honesty, and self-motivation will also be key. Because of the classical emphasis, experience in Latin and New Testament Greek are definite benefits.

The Lake Almanor/Lassen National park area is situated at the northernmost end of the Sierra-Nevada Range and at the southernmost end of the Cascade Range. The environment is alpine with pleasant summers and snowy winters, and the natural landscape is quite spectacular. Recreational opportunities such as fishing, hunting, hiking, kayaking, and cross-country and downhill skiing are plentiful, and the local communities are rural. The school is located about 1.5 hours northeast of Chico, California, and 2 hours northwest of Reno, Nevada.

The motto of St. Andrew’s is “Oratio, Studium, Labor,” which translated is “Prayer, Study, Work,” for this reflects our school’s priorities. Everyday begins and ends with traditional sung prayers, and our students know that our worship is the most important part of the day. Of course, our academic expectations of students are demanding, but in the context of the Christian life, this is viewed as an opportunity to glorify God. We also ask the students to take ownership of their school by helping to maintain the facilities and to work in other ways to serve their neighbors. Involvement at St. Andrew’s is not separable from community life; we constantly seek to encourage and build our community. This is specially important for the faculty as they often lead in this task. As a group of colleagues, we seek to pursue Truth, Goodness, and Beauty, and daily invite our students to join us. This is our educational task. Being involved with St. Andrew’s is rarely easy, but always adventurous and rewarding.

Applicants must understand that St. Andrew’s has always been a work of faith, and as such, there is some risk involved. This is therefore a step of faith for all our staff, but please understand that God has always met our needs—and the needs of our faculty—and the ethos of the school would not be the same without constant dependence on Him.

If this mission intrigues you, please give us a call at 530-596-3343 and ask to speak to Father Brian Foos, Headmaster, or Mr. Kent Bartel, Assistant Headmaster, or drop us an email at . If you have a chance, please email your Curriculum Vitae (academic resume) to the same address.

Provincial Synod, 2006

I suppose a rather boring post to get back into the blogging groove. I've never posted tons, but my goal was to keep a post up about once a week. Obviously, I've failed. Perhaps this will help get me back on track.

We--my wife and I--just returned from a trip to synod in Indiana with two other faculty of St. Andrew's Academy and 11 students (and my infant daughter Elizabeth). Most of us comprise the St. Andrew's Academy Choir and we sang five services in the space of three days there in Indiana--and that was after touring Chicago for a night and a day.

We are so thankful for the wonderful reception the representatives of Churches across the states gave us. Everyone was so kind and generous. They even bought 70+ CD's of our Choir singing Evensong and some hymns.

In contrast to what we heard and saw going on at the ECUSA General Council, our Provincial Synod was an absolute blessing to all who attended, I believe, and our disagreements centered more on whether or not one liked the hymn sang at morning prayer. Thanks be to God for orthodox bishops and leading clergy.

A Related Quote (to the post below)...on Church discipline

"‘In the Primitive Church there was a godly discipline, that, at the beginning of Lent, such persons as stood convicted of notorious sin were put to open penance . . . until the said discipline may be restored again, which is much to be wished.’ – Introduction to the Commination.

Yet Church Discipline was, even throughout the eighteenth century, a much greater reality than at the present day. Excommunications and presentments were still in force, and the commutation of penance was a matter of grave and careful consideration even by so strong a Protestant as William III.

Wordsworth has told us that one of his earliest recollections (about 1777) was seeing a woman doing penance in a white sheet: this was called ‘solemn penance’" (Percy Dearmer's Parson's Handbook, emphasis mine).

Note: The Commination is a penetential service appointed for Ash Wednesday, to be found in the 1662 Book of Common Prayer.

American Churchmanship

A bishop once said to me: "The problem in America is not that we have a poor ecclesiology, but that we have no ecclesiology."

That point has been brought home to me on more than one occasion. We don't seem to have a category in American Churchmanship for "The Church has spoken"--at least not unless we like what she says, in which case we say, "great, but I was thinking that already." Without the authority of the Church in our Christian culture, it becomes a veritable free-for-all in terms of Biblical interpretation and what behavior ought to be seen from a Christian. Yes, most everyone tends to agree that the moral law (the Ten Commandments) ought not to be broken, well, at least most of the law (except that pesky one about the Sabbath).

But what about gossip? What constitutes slander? What about the lack of respect for the officers of Christ’s Church? How often do we hear priests and ministers denigrated by parishioners? Of course, if the Church has spoken and there has been an injustice, then there are means to address that injustice. Well, unless one finds oneself in an autonomous Church. I remember being in just such a situation. That too, seems dangerous, but that’s for another post, I guess.

So why are we so sketchy about trusting the Church? Because, I suppose, we tend to be Americans. We have a rebellious and skeptical streak a mile wide. Of course, as a good evangelical, I was brought up to believe that what the Bible says is true and ought to be lived out.

So, despite my rebellious leanings as a good American, I make every effort to submit to Holy Mother Church as she teaches the faith of the Holy Scriptures “once for all delivered to the saints” (Galatians 4:26; Jude 1:3). In fact, because of my evangelical upbringing, I must be Catholic, and to submit to that change in my life has been, shall we say, life changing.

So why, I ask, doesn’t everyone who believes the Bible to be the very Word of God, inspired by the Holy Spirit, trust what it says about the leadership of the Church? Jesus said He would be with His Church, and we trust that insofar as we believe we have the canonical books of the Bible in our hands, but then we throw out any need for the Church in terms of interpreting the Scriptures or holding the keys to the kingdom. Of course, the back hand of the absolution said by the priest is ecclesiastical justice—discipline. We see it all in John 20: “…Jesus said to them again, "Peace to you! As the Father has sent Me, I also send you." And when He had said this, He breathed on them, and said to them, "Receive the Holy Spirit. If you forgive the sins of any, they are forgiven them; if you retain the sins of any, they are retained” (vs. 21-23).

The Scriptures seem to be pretty clear about the authority of the Church and her officers, but we continually find reason to not follow the Scriptural teaching. We always decide that the officer is wrong Biblically, doesn’t understand the text, doesn’t know his place in the Church, etc. St. Paul tells Titus to “Reject a divisive man after the first and second admonition.” Why then, do we have troublemakers that make a lifestyle out of their divisiveness in the same parish church, year after year?

We have those that wander from Church to Church, avoiding the responsibility and accountability of submitting to authority and always claiming to be misunderstood or just not able to agree in good conscience, etc. Thus, we end up with professionals in the divisiveness arena. They have never submitted, really, to the Church, yet they believe wholeheartedly that they are just doing what they have to do to be a good Christian.

How then, is the Church to handle such people? St. Paul seems to not have an extra category for the very confused. He says reject a divisive man after one or two admonitions and not to suffer an accusation against a priest without at least two or three witnesses. The Church allows these people to move around freely, with no consequences for their behavior, at the risk of damaging the faithful sheep of the fold.

Of course, for the Church to speak the truth in such situations causes all sorts of funny looks and whispers among those who don’t approve of such truth-telling. Yet, that shouldn’t stop the Church from doing that which is right. That shouldn’t stop the Church from actually behaving like the Church; from actually have an ecclesiology.

Being In Christ

Cousin Jodi has asked me to write a post on "remaining in Christ"--I'll try to oblige.

Many of us grew up as Christians in a broadly evangelical context--which essentially means Baptist at least theologically, and probably also culturally too.

So, for those of us who did, remaining in Christ might even be a foreign phrase. I mean, I prayed the prayer, what else do you want to know? The other reality is that for a certain group within evangelical Christianity, there is another phrase that comes into play: "Once saved, always saved."

Evangelical Christianity can be divided rather neatly into the more Calvinist camp of the once saved always saved variety and the more Arminian camp, which, to the Calvinists' horror, believes one can lose one's salvation, thus drawing God's sovereignty into question.

For my two cents--prepare to be shocked those of you who still live in the Baptistic culture (and even more shocked if you live in the Reformed culture)--the whole Calvinist/Arminian debate is a colossal waste of time! The catholic perspective is that God is sovereign and we have free will (I'll save that discussion for another time) and our salvation is connected to both of those ideas. Essentially, we are saved by the grace of God, not anything that we have done--be it belief, faith, baptism or the "sinners prayer".

But faith is a necessary part of that process called salvation, as is baptism, and for many a prayer is also part of the process.

Of course, defining salvation is important to this discussion, so let us quickly define salvation as "being in Christ". Of course, salvation is not just a once for all event, but St. Paul and others continually remind us to keep working out our salvation, in fear and trembling even. We were saved, are being saved, and will finally be saved.

So, if salvation is a continual process, then we ought to be concerned about continuing to be in the process--or as we might put it, remaining in Christ. We are incorporated into Christ in our baptism. That means we become a part of His body. Remaining in Christ is essentially remaining a part of His body, the Church.

How do we make sure to do that? Primarily, that means we participate in the corporate life of the Church in worship; in Word and Sacrament. When we cut ourselves off from the means of our feeding and strengthening, then it is us who dies, not Christ's Church.

Our salvation lies in Christ, and He has ordained that to be a part of Him is to be a part of His Church. They are one and the same.

Noah had faith, yes. Noah put that faith into practice in building the ark. But this did not save Noah. Noah could not just stand around in the rain and go on and on about his faith. That would have got him nowhere but drowned. Noah needed to put his faith in action and get himself into that ark. That's what saved Noah--by being in the ark. So too, we have to come, over and over again, to the ark of Christ. We need to leave the floodwaters behind and enter into the ark--to go into the Holy of Holies where the Ark of the Covenant is. We enter by the shed blood of Christ. We enter after confessing our sins--our dealings out there in the rain and the floods where there is death--and begging for God's forgiveness. We participate in the worship of the Church, hearing the Word read and preached and participating in the visible Word of the Sacrament of the Body and Blood of Christ.

This is (barring unrepentant sin) how we remain in Christ and where we find our assurance. It is a continual life in Christ, always repenting and confessing, always giving ourselvers, body and soul, to God, always reaching for the "prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus."

Hope that helps, Cous'--though none too eloquent, nor detailed. I'll do my best to answer specific questions!

Death

We'll hold a funeral service this next week for my dear parishioner. We'll commune with him tomorrow around the table of our Lord. At the funeral, we'll pray for him. Tomorrow, we'll praise God with him.

For many who live, ecclesiastically, where I lived in years past, this all sounds strange--very strange. The person's dead. Why would you pray for him? What do you mean we'll praise God with him? commune with him?

Our protestant limitations in American Christianity (at least in the protestant sections--actually, probably in much of the catholic sections too) really do us no favors in understanding the Church of Jesus Christ. Broadly speaking, it tends to be thought of as all those who have accepted Jesus into their heart. That, of course, is just not the definition given in the Holy Scriptures. The Church is all those who are "in" Jesus (whether they remember saying the sinner's prayer is really besides the point). This getting into Jesus is by grace through faith and the operation of the Holy Ghost through Word and Sacrament (all that to say that I won't be getting into this stuff, I'm not trying to argue soteriology here).

If we remember that "all" those in Christ are in his Church, then we realize that when we worship with the whole Church, we worship with those that have gone before. Thus, we commune with our departed brother tomorrow at Christ's table, where all the Church communes.

Why do we pray for those who have gone before? Because our prayers do not just have to do with earthly things. We often pray for spiritual growth in Christ for each other here on earth. Why do we presume that such growth ceases to happen because we are departed from our bodies? Being without our bodies may mean that we are free of the temptations of the world, the flesh and the devil, but it doesn't mean that we have nothing else to learn. Unless we are like God when we die, which the Holy Scriptures seem to oppose, we still have much to learn. After all, Adam and Eve prior to the fall had much to learn--and they were without sin.

So, we pray for our brother at his funeral this week and thereafter. After all, he is a member of Christ's Church, and we are to pray for the Church--both here on earth and in the heavenlies.

Re-calibration

I have a dear parishioner who is at home dying. He and his wife are so wonderfully kind and generous to me as I visit them, and I am moved by the seriousness and piety with which they take their faith and spiritual lives.

This sort of situation is not uncommon in the life of a parish priest, I'm afraid. In a healthy parish of some average size, a parish priest is not dealing with this every day, but it comes up periodically. At the recent clericus, one priest mentioned that his parish had been an older parish and in the last dozen or so years, he had buried 90 of Christ's faithful. Wow.

So, I am ministering, to the best of my ability, to this older couple. I bring them the sacrament, pray with them, give them the parish news. The parish can ill afford to lose either one of them, as we don't have that many older people in the parish--well, they're essentially it.

As to the title of this post. Much happens in life that is so trivial and inconsequential. So much happens that is just stupid and insipid and tediously taxing to one's patience. In one sense, because of our laziness and slackness, much just doesn't happen at all.

So many people spend their life complaining--and I point the finger at myself too for such silliness and pettiness. Yet, when I am faced with the death of a wonderful member of our parish, when I meet with a student who has just lost her father, when I see the brokenness all around me, but particularly, death, I have my meter recalibrated.

It's the sort of meter that would flash or buzz when you enter an outhouse. It's the sort of meter that everyone really needs to have and keep calibrated. For me, death up close and personal does a very fine job of recalibrating it. Suddenly the world and life and the universe is all put into perspective, I'm reminded that we only have one ride on this merry-go-round, and each moment is particularly precious and important to the Kingdom of God and to the joyous life I am supposed to live in Him.

So, when I hear the incessant complaining and carping, when I hear how rough it is in this situation or that--and particularly when I come up with those issues from my own heart, I am reminded of the young death of my best friend from childhood, of the young death of two friends and mothers (one a parishioner) on Christmas Eve's two years apart, I'm reminded of the accident this last Christmas time of a family friend who lived through his own car accident only to be killed by the car coming behind him, I'm reminded of my dear parishioner and his wife who is not ready to say goodbye, who spend their days together comforting one another, laughing a little, crying a little and probably just being quiet together as a married couple learns how to be after dozens of years of marriage.

I hope and pray that I am patient and kind and loving to those who are complaining, but I hope to God that I can communicate the important things of life to them too--especially when I am the one complaining. We only go round once; let's live each moment in the joy of our Lord and quit complaining about the great blessings that He has seen fit to bestow upon us--even the blessings of trials and temptations since we know that they are meant for our continual sanctification as well.

And, may God continue to give me opportunities to re-calibrate that all important meter in His timing and will.

The Carmelite Monastary in Napa Valley. Father Brad (first collage, top right) and I made it in time for the start of the Clericus, and I went ahead and stole all these pictures from his camera. Nice photo's, Father!



The Clericus gatherered 17 bishops, priests and deacons on the lovely grounds of the monastary right next door to the Mondavi Winery, whose vines are pictured below (about 80 years old).

Picture Snapping on a Winter's Day

The sleepy hamlet of Chester on a calm morning.



Father Brad and myself were on our way to a clericus (meeting of clergy) and he wanted to get some shots to email his wife and kids. Thus, these pictures.










And, of course, we need a picture of the cleric himself, just to prove he was here.